27/02/2019

Internet Errors



Login Timeout in Southwark






Look it up



25/02/2019

24/02/2019

23/02/2019

There is a happy land...



Far, far away.






29 minutes actually






According to TFL



22/02/2019

21/02/2019

STOP LOOKING AT ME!!!



STOP LOOKING AT ME!!!






ALIEN, FROGGY BEAST!!!






The lip piercing rocks though.



20/02/2019

Books for Children


Being a children's author is a difficult job






Being able to convey






a coherent and gripping story






Using a limited, age appropriate vocabulary







To a young audience






Must be really hard.






Especially when the vocabulary you are using






Contains the words






CRITICALLY ENDANGERED






No wonder






The orangutan is scared






I would be shit scared too






If I were an orangutan






and not a human






Mind you






I'm what the orangutan is scared of






orangutan meatballs anyone?



19/02/2019

Calamity Averted!!!


It may look innocuous






But one false step






Then






BANG!!!






Calamity Averted!!!

17/02/2019

16/02/2019

Matter of Opinion



That is a matter of opinion






To some Ginger Hobnobs are of great and exceptional value.






They are very moreish after all.



13/02/2019

Macabre



I don't know about you.






I find this rather disturbing.






Firstly






The game itself.






Secondly






Why are they getting rid of it?






And finally






Why are they disguising it as a present?



10/02/2019

Opportunity


7,500 square foot of flexible commercial space available!!!






An amazing opportunity indeed.







Perfect size for a cannabis factory.






And open plan as well!!!



09/02/2019

By Any Other Name



Some people call them mobile assets






I call them traffic cones.



08/02/2019

Communication

It's amazing who needs PR these days.







Have the gutters been trolling again?



07/02/2019

Let's Tidy Things Up



Good Idea






Roads and Streets






An emphatic






YES!!!






Mews and Avenues






Outdated






And things of the past






Get rid of them.






There's too much disorder in town planning.






Don't even start me on Closes.



06/02/2019

Synonyms

A prattling prostate pontoon






A garrulous gruff gangplank






A blabby base bridge








A little loquacious link



05/02/2019

How To...



...make a camouflaged Union flag out of plastic string.



04/02/2019

Mixed Emotions

It's at times like this I feel both Profound and Emotional.